the things we fill our days with

i caught myself standing at my bedroom window, staring into the backyard listening to my neighbors, who are undoubtably retired seniors, shuffling around their car port carrying in bags and shutting doors, talking some jumble.

Sidenote: I don't know them very well because they moved in after Steve & Ruth Lendl moved out, a couple who has known me my whole life...that's another story, I'm still a little bitter that they moved and that these new people moved in.

anyway

hearing them during my vacant stare led me to think about the things we do to pass the day.

Of course we don't do it intentionally to pass time but we legitimize these dealings with feelings of assuredness that the tasks we are undertaking are of great importance, and i am not belittling these events in any way, of course, i find myself lost in this blur of random tasks- but i cant stop to think of how we can realize that they are not the things that should define our lives.

So, what should? i guess it falls onto every individual to define that among other things we have to define for ourselves. I just wonder if people thing about this fact of life on a daily & hourly basis. I do and I'm not sure why or how that came about.

I don't know when over rationalizing and over analyzing about my daily activities plagued my mind?

I love these jumps of the mind. They are interesting to say the least.

We feel accomplished when we make lists for the post office, selling something on ebay (my guilty pleasure) finishing a book even if we don't like it, reply to emails, runs to the bank, the ends of the work week, etc...

We fill our days with these things, then the next thing you know, we find ourselves saying, "Wow! Christmas again! It feels just like yesterday was Christmas, this year has really flown by."

It's an interesting thing the way we cannot grasp time. I read in this book, A Severe Mercy, a true love story by they way, how we are always so surprised by time. We have been around for so incredibly long, why can we not get a hold of years, or months or weeks, days, hours...we just don't feel comfortable in a time constraint.

I'd say we were eternal beings because of this. Beings that cannot grasp something that it has lived so long with is an oddity. It's like, waking up next to someone you've been married to for 36 years and saying, "Hey! That's weird, I didn't realize you were still here?" Okay, maybe that's not the best example.

I digress.

The things that fill our days. They aren't necessarily mundane or unimportant, for everything in this life has its reasons of existence and ways that each fit in with the next moment, but I pose the question to you of what you fill your days with-what is the material that you choose to weave your life's foundation?

I challenge you and myself, not to make a list of things to do today, but to pass the time in total spontaneity, involving things and thoughts that drift from the daily workings of our material, business life.